I Know What to Eat…So Why Can’t I Do It?
Time and time again, when I’m on intro calls with potential clients, I hear some version of this:
“I know what I should eat… I just can’t seem to do it.”
This statement is usually shared with a sense of exasperation, a little embarrassment, and a deep sense of confusion. Many of my clients have worked with dietitians or nutritionists in the past who offered familiar “eat this, not that” advice. They left these experiences feeling frustrated, like they were getting information they already knew, or that didn’t quite address the real challenges they were facing with food.
The problem is, whether that advice is coming from a credentialed professional or a stranger on TikTok, the quality of the information might differ, but not your ability to implement it.
When you know “what” to do, but can’t seem to do it, it’s easy to blame yourself. You might assume you’re just lazy, undisciplined, or lacking willpower. But what if the issue isn’t your character, or your knowledge, at all?
Maybe the problem isn’t that you don’t know enough.
Maybe the problem is everything else.
Why “Just Eat This” Advice Misses the Point
It’s easy to believe that if we just had the right food plan, we’d finally get it together. But our relationship with food is just that, a relationship, not a math problem to solve.
Here’s an example I often give clients:
I could tell you to never get annoyed at your partner again because “they mean well.” That’s great in theory, but in real life, relationships are messy. Emotions get involved. So does history. And capacity. And stress. Just having the right thought or intention doesn’t stop the feeling from showing up.
Food is no different.
Advice like “just prep your meals in advance” or “stop buying processed food” assumes that knowledge automatically leads to action. But in practice, that advice completely ignores-
Emotional state and stress levels
Mental health and executive functioning capacity
Time, money, and physical energy
Interoception (your body’s internal cues)
Past experiences with dieting, trauma, or food scarcity
Cooking skills, food access, and even housing stability
The people I work with often have gathered a lot of information about food and nutrition over the years. But they’re not trying to ace a multiple-choice quiz, they’re trying to eat in real life. And real life doesn’t operate on a Scantron.
What Might Actually Be Getting in the Way
There are so many reasons why following through on your intentions around food can be difficult—even when you know what you want to do, or think you “should” do. Here are a few common (and often overlooked) barriers I see in my work:
Executive Dysfunction
“I know what I should eat, but I just can’t follow through with all the planning and steps involved in cooking and meal prep. It’s all too overwhelming.”
If this sounds familiar, check out my post on meal planning with ADHD. Executive functioning includes a lot of mental tasks—remembering what food you have at home, starting the cooking process, following a recipe, staying on task, regulating frustration… It’s not a single step that breaks down. It’s a web.
Just like a spider’s web, there are so many places to get “stuck” when it comes to meal preparation. If you struggle with executive functioning skills like planning, organization, task initiation or working memory, this web can get even stickier.
Food Access + Cooking Skills
Knowing what you want to eat doesn’t magically make it appear in your kitchen.
Some folks don’t have time, energy or the financial resources to shop how they want to. Maybe you don’t have working appliances, or were never taught how to prepare meals in the first place.
Throw executive dysfunction in there (yes these barriers can compound, of course!) and maybe you finally get to the grocery store, only to realize a week later that you completely forget about the broccoli that is shuttered away in your fridge drawer.
Sad, forgotten broccoli anyone?
Emotional Overwhelm
When you’re anxious, burned out, or checked out, it can be hard to even feel hunger—let alone act on it. It’s hard to make a nourishing choice when your nervous system is dysregulated.
Emotional dysregulation can also amplify challenges with executive functioning and just make everything a lot more difficult.
Perfectionism
“If I can’t do it perfectly, I won’t do it at all.”
Sound like you?
This often shows up with clients who’ve internalized rules from diets or wellness culture. Trying to meet those standards can create so much pressure that eating feels impossible.
When we’re overwhelmed by perfectionistic thoughts, it becomes difficult to make a choice at all. This might lead to skipping meals or falling right back into the exact pattern you’re trying to break.
Old Food Rules or Diet Culture Beliefs
Maybe you have worked hard to unlearn diet culture’s dogmas and release perfectionism. You’ve done the work to learn why the rules don’t actually serve you.
You might not believe those rules anymore—but that doesn’t mean they’re gone. They can stick around in the background, subtly shaping your food decisions with guilt, fear, or judgment.
I once had a client say, “I don’t even know if I like eating anymore—it just feels like I’m always doing it wrong.” That feeling doesn’t come from a lack of willpower. It comes from living in a culture that moralizes food and demands perfection.
What Helps Instead
The goal isn’t to “do it right.” The goal is to build a relationship with food that works for you.
Some things that help many of my clients:
Planning for unpredictability
Keep backup meals or snacks that require zero prep. Think of it like building a safety net, not a rigid structure.
Prepping when you can, not when you need to
If you have energy on Sunday, prep then—not at 6:45pm on a Tuesday when you’re hangry and done.
Gentle structure
Structure can be supportive if it’s flexible. Think rhythms, not rigid schedules.
Curiosity over criticism
Instead of “Why did I mess up?” try “What made eating feel hard today?”
Letting go of perfectionism
Your meals don’t need to look a certain way to be “good enough.” And what’s supportive for someone else might not work for you—and that’s okay.
Permission to feel complicated about food
Sometimes we need to grieve our expectations of what eating “should” look like and get curious about what’s actually sustainable.
You’re not failing if you need support. You’re human.
A New Lens on Eating Support
If you’re struggling to follow through on what you “know,” I want you to hear this:
It’s not a discipline problem. It’s a support problem. A capacity problem. A context problem.
You are not broken. You are doing your best inside a system, and a body, that may need different kinds of care than you’ve been taught to give.
So the next time you hear yourself saying, “I know what to eat, I just can’t do it,” pause and ask yourself:
What would make this feel more doable?
And what kind of support would actually make a difference?
If you’re looking for help that makes space for your real life, not just more rules, I’d love to support you.
Reach out here to get started.
